Ask HN: How do you cope with sterss?
I know its a worn up topic, but I just need some help over here. How do you guys cope with stress? I have this guy calling me every day, asking about his project, which is kinda big and I am not even halfway through, and the other guy calling me consistently to upload his website on the server, and the server guys who remind me everyday to pay for it, and another guy on my dayjob who asks me to come up with projects for students to take on some competition. I also have 3 groups of students who have different projects which need to get done, I am just procrastinating that. And there is another guy who offered me a nice job overseas, and I just realized that my passport got expired, so I need to renew it in order to leave the country.
I mean, the solution might be pretty straightforward, just get the freaking job done! But its kinda hard in a way I can't explain. All I know is that I hate my phone, and I hate daylight. Anyone have any suggestions guys? Maybe some books to read, or some life experience things you want to share?
First...breath.
Now...make a list of these priorities and order them by importance to you. Next, meet with everyone except the guy at the top of your list. You don't have to meet with him/her because you're going to be getting that shit done asap. Unless, this is the guy calling you every day. In that case, you're going to have to explain to him that while he thinks that being a squeaky wheel will make it go faster, you don't work that way, and he's only hurting the project.
Alright, when you meet with everyone, you're going to have to explain that you have a lot of competing pressures. With some people you're be able to lay everything bare, and others, well not so much. Some will understand, some won't. But it's your job to explain to them ALL that if something doesn't give, everything will, including their project. If you're like me, your not a big fan of meeting with people and asking for help. You'd rather grit your teeth, bare down, and get it done. Which is awesome...except when you've got so much on the go that it bogs you down and you don't even want to get up in the morning (not good).
You have students? Dump them, or reduce them to the bare minimal.
Great job overseas? Awesome! If this is at the top of your list, then get THAT done ASAP. My parent's were in the same position when we lost my Grandfather a few years ago. I headed straight over to the British Consulate, and I had a plan setup before noon. Cost an arm and a leg, but I got it done, and my parents were able to fly out 2 days later.
I have a few days off, so if I can help with anything, fire me an email at lee(at)peanutdynamite(com).
Now get to work soldier! :)
Are you late on the guy that calls you everyday's project? Did he add requirements to the project? If either of those are correct then you are within your right to polity tell him to back off.
The website upload guy is easy, give him the number of the server guy and tell him to pay the bill, you are in a third party situation there and you need to remove yourself from it. The bill needs to be paid, before you can perform your task, unless you signed up to manage the project, it is his issue to deal with.
With the student projects you need to get those done if you have committed to it, you need to set aside some time and complete them.
Get off of HN and get some things done. Most of these situations are self inflicted either by not getting things done on time or not managing expectations. The minute you actually talk to people and explain the situation, right or wrong, the better you will feel and easier you will be able to focus.